Your client’s self-awareness will often be the key to transiting the therapeutic process speedily and successfully.
We all know individuals whose comments spark reactions, such as:
“I can’t believe you’ve just said that,”
or
“Do you not realise what you’ve just said?”.
These all-too-common retorts from bystanders will reveal that the individual who causes such consternation in others may simply be lacking self-awareness. And, of course, the perpetrator may be totally unaware of the devastating effect which his/her words or deeds have on others.
So why does this situation occur?
We are individuals in our own right but we are also part of the human herd. The client thus will have his/her own personal feelings or reactions to life experiences but he/she must also interact successfully with others in order to fulfil herding instincts in the interests of survival. A lack of social awareness when interacting with others hence may often be an indication that the client is unaware of his/her own emotive responses in the general scheme of things. The equation will consequently then be that your client’s lack of self-awareness will manifest as a lack of social awareness.
If your client arrives for his/her session and is readily able to face his/her shortcomings as a member of the human race, then he/she will also be aware of those feelings which drive his/her psyche. And so access to the client’s emotive world – which is the essence of therapeutic intervention – will, consequently, become an easy ride. The socially unaware individual, however, may not be a good candidate for therapeutic investigation because self-awareness may be a foreign climate.
Your client, conversely, may fall prey to another who is maybe lacking in social awareness. Your client, for instance, may suffer by being associated with someone who is demanding, inconsiderate, dictatorial, immature or just plain selfish.
Is your client regularly subjected to someone else’s bullying tactics?
Does your client feel obliged to accommodate someone else’s petty demands?
Does your client reside with a control-freak?
Does your client live with someone who is prone to emotional outbursts?
Is your client the victim of an intimate partner’s temper tantrums?
Does your client feel stifled by having to contend with someone who is over-pedantic and always insists on getting his/her own way?
Is your client trapped in a job whereby he/she is at the mercy of a selfish or inconsiderate employer?
Does your client suffer from having to cope with over-demanding parents or in-laws?
It will help your client to become aware of the ways in which he/she is having to compromise or sacrifice his/her own needs in order to accommodate those of another. This realisation may be an important part of your client’s therapeutic journey because the next question he/she must ask will be:
Why do I allow myself to put up with a situation in which I am suffering at the behest of another?
And thus your client’s therapy sessions can begin to unravel the reasons why he/she is too accommodating by excavating his/her past and resolving the reason why his/her self-esteem has been put permanently on the back burner.